Rainy Days, Mondays, and a Little Help
by Beth Smith
Summary: From My Friends. Jackie deals with Hyde's marriage in a few ways, but in the end, she learns something important about herself. Dedicated to Casper1990, without whom this fic probably wouldn't have struck me...


**Disclaimer and A/N: **I don't own it. Don't shoot me. Um… This one's kind of going to be written as I go along. I don't have a specific idea. Just a song. The song belongs to the Carpenters. ETA: I definitely finally decided where this is going, and added a Beatles song to the title… Oh, and for my purposes in this fic, Eric is still around. I hate painting Hyde as the bad guy here, but it's just my muse talking. And thanks to Casper1990. Talking to you got me thinking about the things Hyde did to Jackie, and wondering if I'd be able to forgive him after all that. So this fic also deals a bit with that.

**Rainy Days, Mondays, and a Little Help From My Friends**

Jackie Burkhart slammed the door behind her as she ran into her room. What was wrong with her life? All the time she'd spent trying to make Steven Hyde fall in love with her she'd never thought that it would have worked out this way. Why did she love him so much?

She flopped down across the bed after putting on her Carpenters record, fighting back the tears in her eyes. So many times she had been through this stupid crap with Steven, and so many times she had kept fighting for him, even though she knew that he'd keep hurting her. He always had.

As the record began playing, she shook her head, feeling like screaming. Steven had seemed so different. But he wasn't.

He couldn't be… He'd never be different. She'd been right in the first place, as much as she hadn't believed it for a while. Steven was just a dirty… poor… burnout. Just like she'd thought when she was with Michael… Just like he'd told her after she broke up with Michael.

_Funny, but it seems I always wind up here with you…_

_Nice to know somebody loves me._

_Funny, but it seems that it's the only thing to do…_

_Run and find the one who loves me…_

Karen Carpenter's flawless voice rang from the record player, as tears burned Jackie's eyes. That was what it had been like… This was her relationship with Steven. No matter what was hurting her, she always ran to him, whether he liked it or not. He was always there for her, whether or not he wanted to be. Whether it was hanging out with her when she was heartbroken over Kelso, or taking the fall for her when she bought weed, or punching someone's lights out for calling her a bitch, or… Or falling in love with her.

He'd cheated on her… and married someone else after telling her that he couldn't promise her a future. And it didn't help that the someone else was a stripper he'd met when he was drunk off his ass.

She grabbed one of her tons of stuffed animals and wrapped her arms around it, feeling so defeated. It was like a battle, it really was… Being with Steven and trying so hard to keep him… To make him happy, and to make him love her, and dammit, it had drained her. She felt like giving up. And she finally thought she would. She couldn't do it anymore.

She rolled over in the bed, holding onto the stuffed animal… Why did she ever care about Steven? Why'd she ever give a damn about a boy with a fro and sideburns? For God's sake, it was the weirdest thing she'd ever done. She didn't date people who were poor, or who were burnouts, or who weren't the perfect kind of man pretty that Michael was, so why would she have thought that Steven would be different?

She buried her face in the pillow, not even worried about her makeup. She just wanted to cry in peace.

_What I feel has come and gone before,_

_No need to talk it out,_

_You know what it's all about._

_Hangin' around, nothing to do but frown._

_Rainy days and Mondays always get me down._

She sobbed, long and hard. She wanted so much to kill that stupid bitch of Steven's. And then she wanted to kill Steven. She hated him for doing this to her, and yet she loved him so much. She hated wishing that he was holding her when she was wishing at the same time that she could tear the stupid fro out of his head.

She was shaking from the tears when Donna came into the room. "Jackie… Are you OK?" she asked, knowing full well what was wrong and why her friend was crying. Again.

Sniffling and wiping away the tears, Jackie shook her head. "Nothing's wrong. I'm fine, OK… It's just been a bad day."

Donna looked at her friend, wanting to kick Hyde's ass for what he did to Jackie. He deserved to be… well, there were lots of things he deserved. And she would have loved to be able to be the one to make him pay.

"Jackie, you have to realize that you can do better than Hyde," she said, echoing Hyde's words from a few years previous in her dad's car when she'd just broken up with Michael. _Jackie, you've got to realize that you can do better than Kelso._

She started crying again, as Donna comforted her. "It's OK, Jackie. It's really OK. You're stronger than this."

Jackie wished she was stronger. She wished she could be like Donna. But this feminist thing had never worked out for her before.

She closed her eyes, fighting back the memories. This sucked.

God, she wanted to kill Steven Hyde. But not any more than she wanted to marry him. She hated him, and she loved him, and dammit, she couldn't make up her mind.

But in the end, it didn't matter. She couldn't make a decision, because Steven was with that whore. She had no choice in the matter.

When she thought of her Steven sleeping next to that stupid whore… She just wanted to murder her. Tear her eyes out, and scratch her face, or push her off the water tower or…

Donna interrupted her thoughts. "Jackie, don't cry anymore, OK? Hyde did this because he's a stupid dillhole, and he doesn't deserve to have you crying over him."

Jackie nodded. Donna was right. She really was. Steven _didn't_ deserve for her to cry over him.

She looked at her hands, and then faced Donna. "I… I love Steven," she said softly. She looked Donna in the eyes, fighting back the tears. "But I'll be damned if…" She shook her head, trying to force the words out.

"Oh, Donna!" she sobbed, burying her face in her friend's shoulder.

Donna gave the younger girl a hug, and said, "Jackie, it's gonna be OK."

Jackie straightened up next to her friend, and wiped her eyes again. She wasn't going to let Steven ruin her like this. She still had a bit of her Burkhart pride left. "Come on, Jackie," Donna said, smiling at her friend. "We can go raid Hyde's stash. We'll both feel a lot better."

Jackie forced a smile. Donna _was_ right about that.

:Twenty Minutes Later:

Smoke filled the air in the basement, where Jackie, Donna, Eric, and Fez were seated in the circle. "Oh, Jackie," Fez said solemnly. "I am so sorry that Hyde is such a bastard."

Jackie giggled, adding an embarrassing snort to the end. "Oh, my God, Fez!" she exclaimed. "You are SO right! He IS a bastard."

She was going to be crying a few short hours later, and everyone knew it, but as long as she was high, she was going to enjoy it.

Donna passed the joint on to Eric, then looked at Jackie. "Totally. I mean, Hyde's a stupid jerk… What dumbass gets married when he's drunk?"

Eric passed it back to Fez and agreed with Donna. "I mean, y'know, Hyde is still my best friend… and you are still the Yoko that broke up the band, but…" he huffed. "But dammit, Hyde's just not very nice sometimes."

Now it was Donna's turn to snort. Eric was so funny when he had those moments of righteous indignation.

And then, Hyde walked out of his bedroom, Sam right behind him. In his initial shock, not having known Hyde was in the other room, Fez exclaimed, "Sonofabitch!"

Hyde glared at them all and said, "Who told you dumbasses to raid my stash?"

"If it's in the Candy Land box," Eric announced, "It's public property. Except my money."

Hyde rolled his eyes and started toward the table with Sam to get in on the puff and pass action, but Jackie stopped him, glaring at the blonde at his side. "Oh, no, sorry. No stupid slutty bitches in the circle."

Fez added, "Unless I am allowed to do it with them."

Hyde turned his most Zen look on Jackie, and said in an even tone, "Well, then, Jackie… What the hell are you doing here?"

Jackie almost yelled, but then remembered one good thing she'd taken from Steven. She could be pretty damn Zen herself. With a carefree shrug of her shoulders, she said, "Whatever."

Hyde hated himself for teaching her to be Zen. Dammit, he hated it.

Fez looked at Sam with one of his most perverted little smiles and said, "Jackie told me that if I had a dollar, you would sleep with me…" He pulled out a dollar and waved it in front of her face. "Well, I have a dollar…"

Hyde promptly frogged him in the arm, glaring at him. "She's my wife, man," he said, sending a meaningful look in Jackie's direction.

Jackie only looked back with a most Hyde-like, "That's cool."

Turning to Donna, she said, "Hey, Donna, let's go to the movies. It's no fun sharing the circle with Captain Dumbass and his sidekick, WonderWhore."

Hyde gave her a look that clearly told her to watch it. She leaned over to Sam and said just loud enough so everyone could hear it, "Hey, Sam… Just a word of advice… They say dynamite comes in small packages, but…" she looked meaningfully at Steven's jeans. "That doesn't apply to everything."

She started toward the door, followed by Donna only after the redhead grinned and sad, "Nice burn, Jackie."

"Yeah," Jackie agreed. "Too bad Sam probably didn't even get it." She raised an eyebrow, gave a bitchy little smile, and walked out the door, a little extra sway in her hips, which she knew would have Steven's attention, even though he was still probably nursing that burn she gave him.

And get his attention it did. He hated how she had that power over him. But she did, and there was nothing he could do about it.

He looked back at Sam, trying not to show that he felt what Jackie was doing to him. "Don't worry about her," he said, shaking his head. "She's a stupid bitch."

Fez stood up, indignant. "Hyde, you are my friend," he said, anger flashing in his brown eyes. "But Jackie owns my heart. And I will not let you talk to her that way." He shook his head. "Now, I admit, I never wanted her to be with you… Because I love her. And I want her to give Fez some love. But she was happy with you, and now she is not happy, and it's your fault."

The foreign man paused for a breath, having not taken one in that entire confrontation. "And," he added. "If you are going to talk to my sweet beautiful Jackie like that, then we cannot be friends!"

Hyde fought his every instinct to try to make things right with his friends, and instead said, "Y'know what, Fez? Get bent."

He took the joint out of Eric's hand, and inhaled the smoke into his lungs, praying that it would make him forget for a while.

-

In Donna's room, the redhead was holding Jackie, who was again sobbing. "Donna, I love Steven so much," she sobbed, her small body shaking.

"I know," Donna said. "But I was right about you being strong. I mean, you totally burned the hell out of Hyde and Sam!"

Jackie smiled just a little. "Yeah," she said, wiping her eyes. "Yeah, I guess I did."

Both girls knew that it was going to take Jackie a long time to get over this. Steven had hurt her like she'd never thought anyone could. But one day, she was going to be over Steven Hyde. That much she knew. And one day, he'd be wishing that she was still his.

And she couldn't wait to see that day.


End file.
